I ended up stopping writing for a bit, but I am not nervous or frustrated by that. I wrote quite a bit (for me) and I needed to do that to just get it out and know I could write without going crazy trying to make each sentence perfect from the start.
Now I am slowly compiling everything into more of a project rather than something free form, and that feels good. I started researching some history I think would help make my story’s message more solid and help me fill in the plot, and so far I’ve read and got notes on one book and ordered 4 more in the mail.
I am definitely someone who GOES FOR IT with a lot of things, but I also definitely don’t have that raw, seemingly effortless talent that is essential for just winging it to work out. I am 100% someone who needs to learn that things happen in stages, and that perhaps I am sacrificing positive changes along the way by being so focused on what I think the end goal should be.